how to stop collapsing under doubt and build your coaching business with unwavering confidence
becoming anti-fragile
if you are more of a podcast person, you can listen on The $100K Healer podcast.
you implemented the content plan to a T . so why tf isn’t it working?
you’re posting. you’re following the formulas. you’re doing everything you’re supposed to do. and still crickets. no responses, no calls, no clients.
and when things aren’t working, the doubt creeps in faster than you’d like to admit.
maybe i’m not cut out for this. maybe it’s never going to work.
eventually you pick yourself back up... but you lose days, weeks sometimes in these doubt spirals. plus it is zero fun. like 0/10 recommend.
so how do hold yourself steady-BEFORE it starts working? that’s exactly what i want to talk about today.
in today’s episode you’ll learn
the question I ask myself to snap out of doubt spirals and get back to showing up for my purpose.
the inner shift clinicians can make so the strategy actually starts to work
how to access your beginners mind- so you can grow from feedback, instead of collapsing.
press play if you’re ready to stop dithering in doubt and start consistently + powerfully showing up for your coaching business.
**visionary messaging enrollment closes saturday May 9
this is your 8 week virtual coworking space to nail your messaging. together we build the system for marketing your offers that turns the right people into hype-girl clients.
the doubt spiral is normal but not useful.
here’s what the spiral looks like in practice.
you spend time on a post. you put it out there. nobody responds. or you get someone on a call, you follow the script, you do everything right — and they don’t sign. or a client starts to waver mid-program and suddenly you’re questioning your ability to get anyone results at all.
there are so many moments in entrepreneurship where you could doubt yourself. and you will. that’s not the problem.
the problem is what happens next — when you go into your head to try to think your way out of it. you strain. you spin. you look for certainty in your mind and it’s just not there. and so you either collapse under the doubt or you go looking for a new strategy, a new formula, a new content plan that will finally make it click.
but chasing someone else’s strategy won’t provide the certainty that you are after.
i promise. I’ve done it. i’ve tried them all.
the only thing that actually snaps me out of a doubt spiral, is this simple practice.
what do you know for sure?
there’s a question i return to anytime i start to spiral. i got it from Oprah, many moons ago, and i come back to it over and over.
the question:
what do i know for sure?
i’m not asking my head. i direct the question into my body.
sometimes the answer comes in words. sometimes it’s just a feeling — a calm knowing, a visceral certainty that doesn’t need language to be real.
i think of it as your beyond-a-shadow-of-a-doubt place. it’s like your absolute zero — the kelvin of certainty. it exists inside you. and when you’re connected to it, doubt ceases to exist.
i lived from that place when i made the decision to leave residency almost eight years ago. i had no guarantees. i hadn’t done it before. i had no idea how it would work out. but i was so connected to what i knew for sure that i barely doubted myself at all during that time. i was anchored.
that’s what we’re building toward — not certainty about outcomes, but certainty about yourself.
you’re too good to be this fragile
here’s something i’ve been sitting with as i work with clinicians building coaching businesses.
anytime you’re resistant to feedback, you’re fragile. anytime you don’t want someone to give you objective information about what’s working and what could be improved — you are running your business from fragility. and we cannot grow from that place.
i know this intimately because i am this way too. i started back in ashtanga yoga recently, and every time my teacher comes to adjust me in a pose, my first thought is oh, dang it. i didn’t do it good enough. she adjusted me, which means i messed up. there’s a part of me that just wants her to stand there and say “great job, you’re nailing it” every single time. (i know. i know.)
i’ve done this with business coaches too. i show them my sales page copy and i want them to say “wow, that’s amazing.” if they give me “feedback” instead, my brain goes straight to i failed.
this is why so many of us try to figure things out alone. we are scared for someone to witness us in the struggle.
beginner’s mind changes everything
beginner’s mind is the antidote to fragility.
when you approach your business like an experiment — not a performance review — something shifts. you stop taking feedback personally. you stop needing everything to work perfectly the first time. you start being curious instead of terrified.
and on top of that, when you’re connected to the convicted core of your message. that beyond-a-shadow-of-a-doubt knowing inside you — you’re not fragile anymore. you’re not worried about the feedback because you have conviction underneath it.
your only real concern becomes: how do i get this to more people? the ego steps aside. you stop thinking about yourself and start thinking about the work. you become a vehicle for it.
that’s the place where strategy actually lands. where feedback becomes useful instead of crushing. where you can show up with consistency because you’re not losing days and weeks dithering in doubt.
find your anchor phrase
sometimes your certainty wraps itself into language. sometimes it’s just a felt sense.
for me, in my career coaching days, i would come back to this when i doubted almost the entire premise of my work: the world is a better place when people are doing work they love. i would say that phrase and feel the truth of it in my body. and that was enough to send me back out there.
for the $100K Healer, my anchor is: becoming your own source of income is the path to your greatest potential and your greatest impact. i know that for sure. everything i create is built around that belief.
try this
everything i do is based on the belief that…
fill in that blank from your gut, not your head. if you feel it in your body — if it gives you that calm, settled knowing — that’s your anchor. return to it every time the doubt creeps in.
there will always be things you don’t know. there will always be moments where the post flops, the call doesn’t convert, the client wavers. uncertainty is part of this.
but certainty is always available too. most of us are just so practiced at spinning in doubt that we’ve forgotten how to live from the other place.
**visionary messaging enrollment closes saturday May 9
this is your 8 week virtual coworking space to nail your messaging. together we build the system for marketing your offers that turns the right people into hype-girl clients.
The Client Inflow Fix: learn the messaging framework that opens up the floodgates to clients.